New Jersey director, screenwriter, producer, music manager and, of course, comedian KL Martin is a modern day Renaissance man. And he is funny as hell. His Facebook series of perspectives posts are both popular and entertaining. We decided to present them here in a series of posts – Ed
BLACK GUY PERSPECTIVE #258
Oscar nominations are out.
What are the #hashtag/complaints this year?
I personally think that there wasn’t enough canine representation.
In a world where everything can be taken as offensive, understandably so, the constant complaint about the Oscars, a lack of diversity, has been overwhelmingly annoying.
As a filmmaker myself, I get it.
I look around a set or writer’s room and more often than not I’m the lone black guy in the room. There are multiple factors to this but it’s something that definitely needs to be, and has been, addressed.
Especially from a dog aspect. I’m serious.
You’re telling me that not one dog has earned the right to be nominated for an Oscar, SAG or Golden Globe. There have been some crazy dog snubs over the last three decades that have blown my mind.
So Hooch didn’t blow Tom Hanks away scene for scene in the Oscar bait film “Turner & Hooch”? Beethoven didn’t put on a masterclass for dog character actors in cinematic classic “Beethoven” and “Beethoven’s 2nd” ? Don’t even get me started on the Anthony Hopkins of dog actors, Air Bud.
I say we start a petition to get these canines proper representation immediately. They should be given a chance to be up there with the best of the best.
Anyone who disagrees is clearly a dogist. I think that’s a thing, right?
BLACK GUY PERSPECTIVE #241
So, can we talk about the fact that no matter what state you’re in…
Washington state to Washington DC…
That all cops and firefighters sound like they are from Boston, Massachusetts?
I often imagine that there is a specific class in the academy called how to speak “masshole”. You could be a Rhodes scholar from London and after a few months in the academy all you’re A’s get inexplicable linked with W’s.
SOCKS turn to SAWKS
BOSS turn to BAWS
CAR turns to CAWH
Suddenly you sound like Peter Griffin looking to park his car in Harvard Yard. (You cant. I have tried. It didn’t go well).
Hell, I’ll even give it the benefit of the doubt and say “Hey, it the northeast. It makes sense”.
But I got pulled over in Marietta, Georgia. Georgia. In the sticks where banjos are the instrument of choice and the only Boston they know is when you run the table during a game of spades.
The cop sounded like he drove the pike every day and says “wicked pissa” on a daily basis. I looked at him like a dog who hears a weird sound for the first time.
I could have been wrong and maybe that particular officer was from Boston. However, as I said to the cop last winter who offered me a ride home while walking in a snow storm, “ I have two rules regarding cops, I don’t interact with them unnecessarily and and I don’t get in cop cars voluntarily.” Ha.
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