New Jersey director, screenwriter, producer, music manager and, of course, comedian KL Martin is a modern day Renaissance man. And he is funny as hell. His Facebook series of perspectives posts are both popular and entertaining. We decided to present them here in a series of posts – Ed
BLACK GUY PERSPECTIVE #139
Honest to God I wish some of you guys would put as much effort into your hygiene as you do winning online arguments…
Because no matter how right you think you are or actually might be….
No one’s going to care when you smell like sour clothes and several bags of Fritos LOL
Meaning:
OK, Let’s talk people.
I have moved passed the fact that some people take the internet very seriously. We hash out whole arguments about EVERYTHING on it. From big things like, messy divorces and breakups to restaurant reviews and political affiliations, it’s all aired out for everyone to see, probably laugh at or turn into a meme.
But as important as it maybe for you or someone you know to “win” an internet debate (Plot twist: No one does it’s just a never ending game of who gets the last word), none of this matters if you start to smell like a bag sweaty onions. I work in the city and almost every day I stand on the subway next to a guy who is furiously typing in some thread about what color a dress is but smells like he uses red onions as soap and arugula as a washcloth. Where are your priorities? Wash your Ass, my dude.
You’ll have a lot more friends and a lot less time on the internet if you do.
BLACK GUY PERSPECTIVE #12
White people are sentient mood rings.
Embarrassed, sick, cold, hot…Its impossible to not know.
Think about that and get back to me.
Meaning:
Let me just lead of by saying a few things:
I am, among all things I do, a comedian. I sit and come up with or write jokes and get paid to do so. It’s great.
I think everyone is by some measure an asshole.
Being comedian in today’s day and age is almost impossible at this low level. Though I love Chappelle and Jessinik they came up in an era where being who they were and performing as such was normal even encouraged most of the time. If either of those guys existed today in the early stage in their careers, it would be safe to say that they probably don’t exist. They are worth millions of dollars now and pretty much say what they want with zero fear of repercussions.
I live in a world where I have to provide these qualifying remarks because people have lost both sense of humor and the definition of context. It sort of maddening. Now all that said, let’s keep it real or “100” as the kids say these days (I think) and admit that this perspective is accurate as hell. When a white person gets sick, sad, happy or all of the above they change shades. Its so obvious, it’s a wonder how the play poker or can even pretend to be passive aggressive.
I think the small backlash I received from posting this was worth it if only because of the number of people both white and black that came to the defense of this joke. It honestly gave me hope that there are some people (at least my friends anyway) who are out there who realize that context is king in a reality-based world.
Copyright, You Don’t Know Jersey, LLC (2010-2022)
about the author: KL Martin
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